55. Depeche Mode - Blasphemous Rumours (Mute)

 

Four weeks at number one from w/e 17th November 1984

A point that sometimes gets missed about Depeche Mode – but seems only too obvious when you get neck-deep into the band’s catalogue – is that three of the group’s founding members (Gore, Fletcher, Clarke) were regular church-goers before they formed, and the other (Gahan) had a mother who was in the Salvation Army.

While Gore has offered strange reasons for his regular attendance at his Basildon church, putting forward the somewhat limp justification that there was “nothing else to do on Sunday” (a situation that applied to most teens, including me a mere five miles or so down the road, but I managed without) Gahan’s response to his mother’s exhortations to go to church on Sunday was less honest, and he instead chose to bunk off and go cycling instead. If you had to quickly characterise the two members with childhood anecdotes, these would be good places to start; Gore being compliant and gently shrugging his way towards group activities he couldn’t entirely see eye-to-eye with, while Gahan’s life was filled with action and rebellion.

Sunday service appeared to fascinate Gore, however, and he developed a morbid obsession with the prayers being offered for the sick parishioners there. “The person at the top of the list [of names] was guaranteed to die, but still everyone went right ahead thanking God for carrying out His will,” he later remarked. Long after Gore had bothered attending church, these memories appeared to feed their way into the group’s twelfth single, and final release of the most commercially fruitful year of their career.

If “Master and Servant” tested the waters topically and almost got banned by Radio One, “Blasphemous Rumours” was, from start to finish, the biggest act of commercial suicide committed by the group so far. A diatribe against the peculiarities and inconsistencies of the Christian faith, there are no gentle metaphors on offer here, Gore instead choosing to tell his tale in plain language as if he’s spluttering in an outraged fashion in the local pub.

“Girl of sixteen, whole life ahead of her/ Slashed her wrists, bored with life” Gahan rattles off like a telex machine listing the facts. “Didn't succeed, thank the Lord/ For small mercies”. After the first run of the damning chorus about God and his sick sense of humour, we then learn of a girl of eighteen who “found new life in Jesus Christ” and was subsequently “Hit by a car, ended up/ On a life support machine”. It’s not clear if it’s the same girl, whose boredom has been replaced two years later by a sense of virtuous purpose only for her to be killed off in a ho-ho ironic fashion, or a different one – but the effect is the same and God is, as Neil Tennant would later opine in Smash Hits, given a “thorough ticking off”.

If the central message alone was likely to get the church and Christian figures irritated, the song is strangely unsubtle, in places forsaking melody in favour of discordant lines more likely to be favoured by horror film soundtracks, combined with slowly collapsing metallic clangs and gurgling, sucking noises. It not only wants to mention a life support machine, it wants to give you an impression of what one sounds like (I remain thankfully ignorant of whether the group's attempts are accurate or not, but they do seem to strangely imitate a trip to the dental hygienist).

The overwhelming effect is close, lyrically speaking, to second wave punk rock delivered in a synthetic, ambient way. If you took these lyrics and transplanted them to a three chord rant delivered by the likes of Blitz, little would feel out of place; only the context of the mournful pop chorus changes things. “Blasphemous Rumours” is angry in its own strange way, favouring the use of 1984’s sampling technology to get its point across over the previous decade’s brutal and simple lo-fi thrash.

45. Crass - You're Already Dead (Crass)

Two weeks at number one from w/e 31st March 1984

“You’re Already Dead” isn’t Crass’s final single – that would be “Ten Notes On A Summer’s Day”, released in 1986 – but it was the last one to be released while the group were a going concern. They entered 1984 in a state of disarray, burdened by heavy legal costs from the obscene publications court case around their album “Penis Envy”. They were also under the microscope of the tabloid press and the government thanks to their anti-Thatcher single “Mother of a Thousand Dead”, and their creation of a doctored recording faking a conversation between The Iron Lady and Reagan.

It’s impossible to speak on their behalf, but Crass were possibly beginning to feel the downsides of being a scratchy anarcho-collective living off their wits and little other external support. They may have operated successively away from the music business, taking matters into their own hands and surviving, but the more their reputation grew, the more interest they attracted from the mainstream media as well as the music press.

Music journalists in the eighties were, for all their critical savagery and their belief that they could make or break careers, pussycats compared to the tabloid press. They adored rebellion, and most were also niche publications, talking to an audience who understood their language, had sympathies with the idea of rock music being an agency for change, and generally didn’t get too upset about punk groups with hard-hitting viewpoints provided they weren’t fascistic.

Newspapers, on the other hand, were widely read, still thought of punk rock as being a possible threat to society, and loved the idea of singling out smart-arsed angry young men and women for a public flogging. That’s essentially where the Sex Pistols ended up in the late seventies, and in the case of Crass, typewriters in Fleet Street were beginning to become damaged by hacks bashing out feverish stories about these disgusting lawless vagabonds. In a flash of total absurdity, News Of The World were even moved to comment that the title of Crass’s album “Penis Envy” was “too obscene to print”. You hardly need me to highlight the stupidity, hypocrisy and irony in those four words.

It’s tempting to think that experienced warhorses such as Crass were able to roar with laughter, let these situations pass and even enjoy being provocateurs spreading their ideas to the broadest possible audience. I suspect, though, that they quickly found out that readers of tabloid newspapers are strangely unforgiving types, willing to apply pressure to the families of people featured in their stories as well as the individuals themselves. Penny Rimbaud commented in the liner notes for their compilation LP “Best Before 1984”:

“We found ourselves in a strange and frightening arena. We had wanted to make our views public, had wanted to share them with like minded people, but now those views were being analysed by those dark shadows who inhabited the corridors of power… We had gained a form of political power, found a voice, were being treated with a slightly awed respect, but was that really what we wanted? Was that what we had set out to achieve all those years ago?”

On top of that, the group were beginning to disagree with each other about some of their core political principles, including whether or not pacifism was a viable position. Pressure came from within and without, and the central supporting beam could not hold the weight.

“You’re Already Dead” almost seems like an audio souvenir of these contradictions and struggles. If The Jam had “Beat Surrender” as a farewell single where Weller set out his reasons for throwing in the towel – a very straightforward and principled address to The Kids – the very sound of YAD feels like a group falling into pieces in front of you in real time. It starts immediately with a cacophony of out-of-time musicians and screaming and swearing, before slowly finding its order and beginning properly as something akin to a sleepy, creepy anarcho-punk reading of the “Are You Being Served?” theme, as we’re told “Ask no questions, hear no lies/ And you'll be living in the comfort of a fool's paradise.”