57b. Jesus & Mary Chain - Upside Down (Creation)

 

Further 3 weeks at number one from w/e 16th March 1985

It's been a while since we've seen an old number one boomeranging back up to the top again, and I'm actually relieved about that - I dislike the way that kind of repetition messes up the narrative of the blog. Still, the facts cannot be argued with, and while The Smiths "How Soon Is Now" was a track with only a feeble grip at the top and a modest toehold in the official charts, "Upside Down" remained a curiosity to casual buyers wandering into Rough Trade. The continued Mary Chain hype kept sales steady, and as soon as The Smiths showed any signs of weakness, the Reid brothers reclaimed their crown again. 

Resting warily beneath them were this lot, who didn't really offer much of a threat.

Week One

22. Balaam And The Angel - Love Me (Chapter 22)

Peak position: 9

With a crash, a smash and a despondent but insistent reverberating guitar riff, "Love Me" cemented Balaam And The Angel's early reputation as an exciting new goth rock act. Sadly, it bears no relation to the parodical Dudley Moore track of the same name, though it does holler as loudly at times - instead, it advises children to follow their instincts, ignore hate, and find their kinfolk. Fair advice from the Balaams, really, offering the kind of hopeful thinking very few goth acts managed.

27.Billy Bragg - Between The Wars (Go! Discs)

Peak position: 27

"Marketed by Chrysalis Records" is clearly written on the back of the sleeve for this one, but in their new 1985 welcoming spirit, the NME let it in the indie charts for one week anyway. 

Stunning how much "Between The Wars" sounds even more stripped bare and underproduced than almost anything else we're discussing today, though. You could be forgiven for thinking this came out on Bluurgh Records; Bragg's honking vocals and the abrasive clang of his guitar sound bare and ragged. Nor is the lyrical content a million miles off the most politicised single on Crass Records, it's just that Bragg has more folk poetry and grandeur at his heart, despite the sonic evidence to the contrary - this is a pro-union song and a prayer for the return of more open and charitable times against the cynicism of Thatcherism, rather than a war cry to kill the rich. 

If there's one thing Bragg gets which the anarcho-punks of the era didn't, it's that sometimes you have to offer your downtrodden audience a message of unity and solidarity as well as screaming for a possible bloody revolution. "Between The Wars" is perhaps a bit too despairing to offer them everything they needed in the hopelessness of 1985, but one picket line anthem is better than none. 

28. D.O.A. - Don't Turn Yer Back (On Desperate Times): The John Peel Session (Alternative Tentacles)

Peak position: 19

29. Severed Heads​ - Goodbye Tonsils (Ink)

Peak position: 29

Australian industrial duo who specialised in synth rackets, audio junk cut-ups from film and television and an ongoing fascination with the perverse and repellant. Much of their work sounds slightly too cluttered and basic to truly surprise casual listeners in 2025, but at the time, "Goodbye Tonsils" felt inventive, threatening and strange. 

30. Rabbi Joseph Gordon - Competition (Bam Caruso)

Peak position: 30

Julian Cope masquerading as a garage rock rabbi, presumably for reasons of career slump boredom and general mischief. There's an argument to be made for "Competition" injecting a sense of purpose back into his life again, though - the road away from Mercury Records and towards Island and further Top 40 success was long at this point, but the abandonment of the introspective psychedelia of "Fried" and towards hard-hitting garage Kingsmenisms possibly started here. 

This isn't to say that "Competition" is in any way essential; it's as likeable but also as throwaway as any genuine garage obscurity you're likely to hear this month. So far as Cope was concerned, though, mission accomplished.

Week Two

9. Conflict - This Is Not Enough Stand Up And F*ucking Fight (Mortarhate)

Peak position: 3

Conflict had a fine way with snappy and abusive single and album titles - this one and "Only Stupid Bastards Help EMI" pop into my head all the time.

"This Is Not Enough" is just over two minutes of agitated noise, grinding guitars and lyrics which veer towards the incomprehensible throughout the anger, but you can guess what it is they're generally on about, and you're seldom far from wrong. Like a lorryload of spare gear boxes and biscuit tins being thrown into a thresher. 

12. The Vibes - I Hear Noises (Malon Republic Music)

Peak position: 8

More garage psychedelia. The Vibes often veered towards the rockabilly side of things and had previous associations with Big Beat Records, but "I Hear Noises" is pure Nuggets adulation, clutching on to a sci-fi tv series riff and drug-induced psychosis with a dedication which suggests they weren't in it purely for the giggles. 

For all the cliches, it's staggeringly well put together and could pass as the real thing; a rare thing indeed for a group stuck in the hi fidelity mid-eighties. 

17. Swans - Raping a Slave EP (K422)

Peak position: 7

23. bIG⋆fLAME – Rigour (Ron Johnson)

Peak position: 23

Debut entry for the ambitiously experimental Ron Johnson record label, which over the course of the next few years will put out a series of singles and albums which showcase the harder and more angular side of the indie underground before its inevitable bankruptcy. Not for Ron Johnson the badly recorded Byrds or Orange Juice influenced jangle of the moment; instead they signed up groups who sounded as if the four members had conflicting ideas about the direction the next line of each song should go in, never mind what genre of critically approved albums they should be slavishly copying.

It's possible to hear the influence of Gang of Four and Captain Beefheart on bIG fLAME's work, but it also feels as if everything else has been thrown into their mincer as well, including the more unpleasant bits of offal. Difficult to chew on without crunching your teeth against an inexplicably sharp lump, but what an incredible bloody noise. 

25.  Win - Un-American Broadcasting (Swamplands)

Peak position: 22

Swamplands were affiliated to London Records ("so what are they doing in the indie charts then?" - a voice) and were Alan Horne's attempt to create a major label backed project, bringing his talent scouting to big business after the winding down of Postcard Records.

The whole venture descended into farce almost as soon as Horne's arse sat down on the dentist's chair he ordered for his own private office, and most releases on the label failed to pick up any attention. Win, formed from the workable remains of The Fire Engines, were exceptions, producing big sounding pop records with glimmering confidence. So lush were their records that music journalists would debate their failure for years afterwards. 

In reality, having Horne acting as your ambassador at this point was probably a hinderance rather than a help. While he appeared to see life as one elaborate art school prank, Win sounded like ex-art school kids who wanted to give up subsisting on tinned fish and leftovers and wanted a piece of pie instead. "Un-American Broadcasting" doesn't sound like a hit, exactly, but the fact you can hear elements of George Michael and Cupid and Psyche era Scritti Politti bleeding around the edges speaks volumes.

Week Three

17. Flux of Pink Indians - Taking a Liberty (Spiderleg)

Peak position: 5

19. Toy Dolls - She Goes To Finos (Volume)

Peak position: 7

Could The Toy Dolls follow up the success of "Nelly The Elephant"? No, obviously. "She Goes To Finos" managed to slip neatly into the lower reaches of the Top 100 of the official singles chart, and saw the group predictably preaching to their usual audience plus a few hundred extra curious hangers-on. 

That's not to say that the group's visibility wasn't greatly improved by their hit single status. Where I lived in Essex, a huge and well executed spray-painted mural of the Toy Doll's "big sunglasses and gleaming teeth" logo popped up on the side of a shelter overnight and made me wonder who had bothered to wander out to do it - were the Dolls worth risking a criminal record for?

"She Goes To Finos" suggests not, unless that deeply Merseybeat fa-la-la-la chorus screamed rebellion to the kind of kids who practiced graffiti art in 1985. It has the feel of a single that might have been a hit in either 1978 or 1964, but certainly nowhere after or inbetween. 

20. Einstürzende Neubauten - Yü-gung (Some Bizzare)

Peak position: 16

22. Chakk - You (Fon)

Peak position: 12

23. Red Lorry Yellow Lorry - Chance (Red Rhino)

Peak position: 10

29.Various – Never Mind The Jacksons... Here's The Pollocks EP (Abstract)

Peak position: 29

Eight track budget EP - although surely that makes it more of a compilation album? - celebrating the Abstract Records roster, leading with Three Johns "Fruit Flies". In common with most indie label samplers, it's a mish-mash of good, inexplicable and mid quality work with some commonality, but not enough that the average punter was going to love all of it. 

For the full charts, please go to the UKMix Forums

Number One In The Official Charts

Dead or Alive - "You Spin Me Round (Like A Record)" (Epic)

Philip Bailey with Phil Collins - "Easy Lover" (CBS)